I’ve been dating my current boyfriend for 2 years now, though we had been dating for 4 years a long time ago. After my failed online dating and toxic relationship, I thought I made a huge mistake when I broke up with Alek. He has always treated me well and never offended my parents (like my ex did). He has always paid for everything and never mentioned this fact during our “fights.” Actually, those fights are always initiated by me and I’m usually the only one who screams or talks. When Alek sees that I’m not in the mood or I’m tired or depressed, he tries not to disturb me. Or, he simply does something sweet to lift my mood.
Gifts don’t mean anything
One of the best male traits that most girls dream about is gifting flowers. Alek is showering me with flowers, chocolates, and compliments. He surprises me with some spontaneous trips and lovely texts. But unfortunately, as much as I appreciate his efforts, those gifts don’t make me happy. On the contrary, I get frustrated and start pitying him. He is great, but I don’t love him.
Love starts in the heart, not in the mind
My friend often tells me that I’m too picky and pesky. She says that I was blessed to meet an ideal man and I’m so ungrateful. I do realize it at times. But love starts in the heart, not in the mind. I have tried hundred times to make myself to fall in love with him and marry him – I know our family would be strong and happy, but love…
Family is nothing without love
Today, I’m stuck between “this guy will be a wonderful husband and father to my future kids” and “I don’t love him.” I believe a family without love is nothing because I was grown up with the parents who have never loved each other. Children feel it and suffer from it. I don’t want my future children to experience everything that I did in a family without love.
I’m sure, Alek will find someone who will love him and care for him… who will make him happy. I won’t be able to do it, no matter how I respect him and like him as a friend. He still tries his best to win my heart, but unfortunately, I don’t have enough power to make myself love him.